This blog is part of thinking activity assigned by Ms. Megha Ma'am Trivedi to critically analyse the motherhood in 21st century, The Joys of Motherhood by Buchi Emecheta and film/TV serial/advertisement/web series.
1) If Nnu Ego were living in 21st-century urban India or Africa, how would her understanding of motherhood, identity, and success change?
Introduction
If Nnu Ego, the tragic protagonist of Buchi Emecheta’s The Joy of Motherhood, were transposed into 21st-century urban India or Africa, her understanding of motherhood, identity, and success would be significantly reshaped, though not completely liberated from patriarchal residue. Modernity would offer her new possibilities of selfhood, yet cultural expectations surrounding women and motherhood would continue to exert pressure.
Motherhood: From Sacred Destiny to Negotiated Choice
In traditional Igbo society, motherhood is sacralized and absolutized. A woman’s worth is measured almost entirely by her ability to bear children—especially sons. Nnu Ego internalizes this belief so deeply that childlessness initially drives her to despair and near annihilation of selfhood.
In a 21st-century urban context, however, motherhood would be:
-
demystified
-
medicalized and planned
-
separated from moral worth
Urban India and Africa increasingly acknowledge motherhood as a choice rather than a compulsory destiny, shaped by:
-
family planning
-
reproductive rights
-
economic constraints
-
women’s education
Nnu Ego would likely view motherhood as one aspect of life, not its total meaning. Instead of measuring her success by the number of children she produces, she might focus on quality of care, emotional bonds, and balance between self and family.
Most importantly, modern discourse would help her recognize that self-sacrifice is not the same as love, a realization denied to her in the novel.
Identity: From Relational Self to Individual Subject
Nnu Ego’s tragedy lies in the fact that she never develops an identity independent of others. In the novel, she exists only in relation to men and children—as Agbadi’s daughter, Nnaife’s wife, and Oshia’s mother. Her repeated question, “When will I be free?”, reveals her lack of personal autonomy. In a 21st-century urban setting, this limited understanding of identity would be confronted by new possibilities. Urban life encourages women to see themselves as individuals with personal ambitions, opinions, and rights. Through exposure to feminist thought, economic independence, and legal protection, Nnu Ego would gradually learn to view herself as a complete human being rather than merely a functional role. Although cultural conditioning might still cause internal conflict, she would have the language and social space to question her self-effacement and seek personal fulfilment beyond familial obligations.
One of the greatest tragedies of Nnu Ego’s life is the absence of a self beyond relationships. Her identity is entirely relational:
-
daughter of Agbadi
-
wife of Nnaife
-
mother of Oshia and others
She does not exist as an autonomous individual. Her haunting question—
“When will I be free?”reveals her deep existential entrapment.
In the 21st century, urban spaces foster the idea of the individual woman as a subject, not merely a role-bearer. Exposure to:
-
feminist ideologies
-
women’s employment
-
legal protections
-
peer communities
would allow Nnu Ego to conceptualize herself outside marriage and motherhood. She might still struggle emotionally due to cultural conditioning, but she would no longer lack language or frameworks to articulate her suffering.
Thus, her identity would shift from self-erasure to self-recognition, even if imperfectly realized.
Success: From Patriarchal Promise to Human Fulfillment
For Nnu Ego, success is defined traditionally as:
-
having many children
-
securing sons’ loyalty
-
gaining social respect in old age
Ironically, this promise collapses cruelly when her children abandon her, revealing the hollowness of patriarchal assurances.
In contemporary urban society, success is:
-
plural
-
personal
-
internally defined
Nnu Ego might redefine success as:
-
emotional security
-
economic independence
-
dignity and self-respect
-
mutual care, not one-sided sacrifice
Rather than aspiring to be a “canonized mother” after death, she might seek a life lived with agency and presence.
Conclusion
Thus, if Nnu Ego were living in modern urban India or Africa, her understanding of motherhood, identity, and success would shift from rigid traditional definitions to more flexible and humane interpretations. While traces of patriarchal expectation would persist, she would no longer be trapped within a single narrative of womanhood. Modernity would offer her alternatives that affirm her individuality and dignity.
2) Buchi Emecheta presents motherhood as both fulfilment and burden. Do you think the novel ultimately celebrates motherhood or questions it?
Although The Joy of Motherhood initially appears to celebrate motherhood as sacred and fulfilling, the novel ultimately questions, destabilizes, and critiques motherhood as an institution shaped by patriarchy and colonial modernity.
Motherhood as Ideological Fulfilment
At the novel’s outset, motherhood is portrayed as:
-
the highest female achievement
-
a spiritual and cultural duty
-
a source of social legitimacy
Nnu Ego’s joy at childbirth reflects a deeply ingrained belief that motherhood grants women immortality through lineage. This belief aligns with traditional African communal values where children ensure continuity and care.
At this stage, Emecheta allows motherhood to appear emotionally fulfilling, reinforcing why women like Nnu Ego embrace it unquestioningly.
Motherhood as Lived Burden
As the narrative progresses, Emecheta strips away the romantic veneer. Motherhood becomes:
-
physically punishing
-
emotionally exhausting
-
economically devastating
Nnu Ego works relentlessly to feed her children while receiving:
-
no emotional support
-
no financial security
-
no recognition
Her suffering exposes motherhood as gendered labour—essential yet unpaid and invisible.
Colonial Capitalism and the Breakdown of Communal Support
One of Emecheta’s sharpest critiques lies in linking motherhood’s burden to colonial urban capitalism. In Lagos:
-
communal childcare collapses
-
men’s authority remains intact
-
women bear responsibility without support
Thus, motherhood is doubly oppressive—rooted in tradition but intensified by colonial modernity.
The Irony of the Title and Ending
The title The Joy of Motherhood is profoundly ironic. Nnu Ego’s death in isolation exposes the false promise that motherhood guarantees fulfillment or security.
The final chapter, “The Canonized Mother,” condemns a society that:
-
exploits women in life
-
glorifies them only in death
This canonization is not celebration but satirical indictment.
Does Emecheta Reject Motherhood?
Crucially, Emecheta does not reject motherhood itself. Instead, she questions:
-
compulsory motherhood
-
sacrificial motherhood
-
motherhood as the sole female destiny
The novel calls for a redefinition of motherhood based on choice, reciprocity, and dignity.
Conclusion
Ultimately, Buchi Emecheta does not reject motherhood itself but questions the romanticized and compulsory form imposed on women. The novel challenges the idea that motherhood is naturally fulfilling and reveals how it becomes oppressive when stripped of choice and support. The Joy of Motherhood thus stands as a powerful critique of the social systems that exploit women under the guise of maternal idealization.
3) How is motherhood portrayed in a film/TV serial/advertisement/web series (Add two to three examples), and how is it similar to or different from Nnu Ego’s experience in ?
Motherhood in popular visual media such as films, television serials, advertisements, and web series is often idealized, emotionalized, and romanticized. These representations shape social expectations by presenting motherhood as a natural source of joy, fulfillment, and moral superiority. However, when compared with Nnu Ego’s lived experience in Buchi Emecheta’s The Joy of Motherhood, a striking contrast emerges between representational motherhood and experienced motherhood.
Motherhood as Emotional Sacrifice in Film: Taare Zameen Par (2007)
In Taare Zameen Par, motherhood is portrayed as emotionally nurturing and morally redemptive. Ishaan’s mother is shown as caring, anxious, and deeply attached to her child. Although she initially fails to understand Ishaan’s learning difficulties, her love is constant and unquestioned. The film presents motherhood as an emotionally intense bond in which the mother’s suffering is meaningful because it eventually leads to her child’s well-being and success.
This portrayal is similar to Nnu Ego’s experience in the sense that both mothers sacrifice endlessly for their children. Like Ishaan’s mother, Nnu Ego believes that a mother’s duty is to endure suffering silently. However, the difference lies in the outcome. In Taare Zameen Par, maternal sacrifice is ultimately rewarded through the child’s emotional growth and social recognition. In contrast, Nnu Ego’s sacrifices lead to abandonment and loneliness. Her children do not become sources of emotional fulfilment but reminders of broken promises. Thus, while cinema presents sacrifice as purposeful and healing, Emecheta exposes it as tragically futile.
Motherhood as Moral Ideal in Television Serials: Anupamaa
Indian television serials such as Anupamaa portray motherhood as a moral and emotional ideal. Anupamaa is shown as endlessly giving, forgiving, and emotionally available to her children even when they disrespect or exploit her. Motherhood is represented as a woman’s central identity, and suffering is glorified as proof of moral strength. Even when Anupamaa seeks independence, the narrative repeatedly brings her back to her maternal role.
This portrayal closely resembles Nnu Ego’s ideological conditioning. Like Anupamaa, Nnu Ego believes that a good mother must sacrifice everything without expecting anything in return. However, the difference lies in narrative justice. Television serials eventually reward maternal endurance by restoring respect, recognition, or emotional reconciliation. In The Joy of Motherhood, there is no such narrative consolation. Nnu Ego’s life ends without recognition, and society praises her only after her death. Emecheta thus critiques the very ideology that TV serials continue to reinforce—that motherhood must be self-denying and saintly.
Motherhood in Advertisements: “Maa ke Haath ka Khana” (Food Brands / Baby Products)
Advertisements frequently portray motherhood as instinctive, joyful, and emotionally fulfilling. Mothers are shown smiling while cooking, feeding, or caring for their children, suggesting that maternal labor is effortless and naturally rewarding. Pain, exhaustion, and emotional struggle are carefully erased to maintain a comforting image of the selfless mother. Best example is below advertisement how mother carry professional duty with selfless motherhood...
This representation is fundamentally different from Nnu Ego’s reality. While advertisements reduce motherhood to emotional warmth and domestic happiness, Emecheta presents it as physically exhausting and economically oppressive. Nnu Ego’s motherhood involves hunger, labour, and despair rather than smiles and fulfillment. Advertisements create an illusion of maternal joy, whereas The Joy of Motherhood dismantles this illusion by revealing the cost hidden behind such images.
Overall Comparison with Nnu Ego’s Experience
Across films, serials, and advertisements, motherhood is portrayed as meaningful because it is emotionally rewarding, socially recognized, and ultimately fulfilling. Suffering is shown as temporary and purposeful. In contrast, Nnu Ego’s experience reveals motherhood as a lifelong burden shaped by patriarchy, poverty, and colonial modernity. Her suffering is permanent, unacknowledged, and unrewarded.
While popular media often reinforces the myth that motherhood is a woman’s natural destiny and greatest achievement, Emecheta questions this assumption by presenting motherhood as a socially imposed role that erases women’s individuality. Nnu Ego’s tragedy lies not in being a mother but in being denied any identity beyond motherhood.
Conclusion
Motherhood in popular visual media tends to romanticize sacrifice and promise emotional returns, whereas The Joy of Motherhood exposes the harsh reality behind such representations. By contrasting idealized media images with Nnu Ego’s lived experience, Emecheta challenges audiences to reconsider the cultural narratives that glorify maternal suffering while ignoring women’s humanity. The comparison reveals that what is celebrated as “joy” in representation often becomes “tragedy” in lived experience.



.jpg)